Pope Announces Decision To Make Annulments Easier For Flock, Millions Begin Searching For Replacement Spouses

Pope Francis’s decision to make annulments less cumbersome and time consuming has had mixed results among his flock, with the conservative hierarchy aghast at his pseudo – Catholic leanings and the congregation signing an angelic ‘ Alleluia’.

Cardinal Juan Cock of Italy gave a stunning rebuke to the papal directive calling it ‘ a sure sign that he (Francis) is one of the lizard people we were warned about. A destroyer of hopes and dreams.”

The conservative Why You Feel You Can Have Sex, You Not Married Association of American Catholic Bishops summed it up with these words:

” Pope Francis is giving unmarried people the licence to have sex. That should never happen. Only married people , however miserable, should be allowed to have sex. Allowing anyone to divorce will mislead society into thinking sex is for them.’

However millions of Catholics around the world have started trending  these  hashtags ,#alwayswantedasecondwifethanksPopeFrank, #divorcerocks, #finallyIcansayseeyousucka, as they aim to take advantage of the new rules regardless of whether they had ever thought of divorce. Obviously Pope Francis deserves a medal for his most noble act.

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